It was 4.55 pm. Time seemed like passing very quickly. I
looked around and everyone seemed in a hurry. Head swaying left right and
people whispering. The whispering grew louder and louder as time when by. People
asking last minute questions also good time to understand the fundamentals of
long distance data exchange and mutual understanding and team work.
My paper was almost done and there was just enough time to
write the second part of last question. I guess there are two techniques to
write a exam paper. i.e either super ‘rattafication’ or super awesome speed.
Trust me 3 hours and 6 questions is a very tough ask. Good
writing speed was a “MUST HAVE” thing for us.
I mostly relied on speed and creativity and concept. The
type of technique commonly explained as “tying the goat around the tree and
explaining tree”. Very famous and very effective technique I must say.
I could have wrote
the answer in due time but I did a mistake of looking at my fastrack wrist
watch which was gifted to me by a very special person. And then it happened.
Shivering hands, deviated vision and a total mental lock-down. Everything froze
but my hands were still writing. It was just too hard to believe in
approximately 4 mins from now everything is getting over.
I had been waiting for this moment to come in my life since
very long and now when it almost here all am doing is trying to explain some
stupid point on fidelity and diversity w.r.t to computer communication system.
“Oh come now, you wrote like almost 5 questions. Let go it
and feel the joy of this moment” one part of my brain said.
“Don’t you dare listen to that lazy creature. It for the
last time you are writing an exam paper anyway. Finish it off with a bang!”
In this fight of mind weather to write or not I ended up
doing a blunder of “oh shit!!” level.
I ended up writing a prayer in middle of answer. And before
I could take any corrective action the invigilator was standing on my tomb with
his hands stretching out and as I delayed a few seconds her expression changed
like I was stealing right under her nose. And then in split second she snatched
the paper right under my pen and thats it. The moment came and went just like
that.
That time I felt like I am walking in slow motion and
everyone is running and sprinting around me, it felt like infinity. It is here
and I am in it.
I instantly knelled right in the middle of the class and
said 'our Father' and 'hail Mary'.
Everyone understood hence no one interrupted me. This was my
moment, my space and my zenith.
While praying a small voice creped in my head
“This is the feeling of success”
“This is what happens when you feel happy”
And then nothing mattered. Be failures of past, depressing
memories, forgettable moments, sense of dissatisfaction or punishments caused
by mind on body. None of it mattered they came and just vanished as the smile
on my face grew brighter and wider.
Then all I was left with was an absolute sense of bliss,
grace and achievement.
Jesus Christ! Saturday never felt so relaxing neither before
nor after that.
Although in the biggest war of my life circumstances, world
and negativity did win many battles and gave me serious kicking but ultimately
the united states
The journey from 53% to 74% was not easy. Some hurdles life
added some I introduced myself. Now was the moment of acceptance and
forgiveness.
By the time I stepped out of the class I had made peace with
my mind, conscious and life. I felt like I was in this state of introspection
for hours but it was only 5.10 pm.
And then snapped!
My friends brought me into reality by giving a really tight
hug and almost crushed my ribs and I was still laughing. And then all I could
hear was
“daru !!….daru !!….daru !!….daru !!…”
It was the sound of 100 odd vocal chords shouting the same
word over and over and over again with increasing decibels in every repeat.
It was the Saturday I made truce with myself and now we both
are ready to fight this world.
“Together”
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