It was the first day of my college. My MBA College. Doing
MBA was always a huge personal ambition rather than a dream for me. It was
something that was also a very obvious choice since I had done my Bachelors in
Commerce. Going through the entire Mba screening process was a very interesting
experience. I must mention here that IBSAT was one of the toughest. But I am
glad I did considered it in the beginning itself. You know how this CAT scores
are roofing up. Cracking IBSAT was tough but getting through GD and PI was
simple. So at the end of, it was the only best thing I had with me. But I
believe that it was suppose to happen the way it did happened in the end.
So many things were on my head as I drove my Yamaha FZ
through the narrow shaded roads inside Hiranandani complex in Powai. The entire
complex is cozy and cool at the same time. The tall building gives a new
definition to architecture and in one such beautiful building was situated my
college. IBS Mumbai it was, a three floored building with a huge open space in
the reception area. The college campus is just enough for the purpose it
serves. Neither too big nor too small, Just the appropriate size. Just like the
space in my heart. It is just the right size. Walking through the glass gates
filled my lungs with the air of achievement, content and ambitions. Somehow I
already knew that my life is no longer going to be same.
And I saw the first signs of it when I opened the doors
to class room LH3. She was sitting there neatly dressed in formals, a pony tail
hairdo and my eyes were just stuck on to her. Deep down a voice echoed,
everything in my life was about to change, rather than changing it was going to
become better. And my life just changed, it was 17th June 2013.
I would deliberately sit in front of her; I wanted her to
notice me. More over I wanted her to notice me noticing her. There was really
something special going on between us. But our shyness was coming between us.
That awkwardness that by default appears when, your intentions about the other
person are much more than friends. It remained the same for another month.
Getting her number was not a very big task specially now
in the times of Whatsapp and other socialization apps. We were on the same
class group on whatapp and we started to talk on personal chats. It stayed this
way for some time. Although we talked for hours on whatspp we were really shy
to talk each other in front of college (probably bcoz of our shyness). But i
broke the ice one day by giving her a chocolate. Since then we talked in person
as well.
I was going through a tough emotional phase at that time.
I found a very genuine friend and a trusted person in Ishitaa (with a double
aa...). She not only helped me in getting over it quickly but i found a
beautiful person in her during that phase. Even though we both had brown eyes,
her eyes are much cuter and far better than mine. I would easily get lost in
them while we would talk. Those blackish brown eyes would just take me to
another place. A place I wished to get lost never to be found again. She had
one of the most beautiful brown eyes.
We began to sit next to each other in class. All of our
friends knew from our strange behaviour that there was something fishy going on
between us. I guess friends know it before you know. So it was on 27th
August I formally proposed her. Well it wasn’t an actual proposal; it was
something very unique or rather special I would say.
We were having a nice evening dinner at TimBaktoo’s a
very cool hangout place which is situated just near to our college in Powai. We
decided to have some drinks you know just to feel a bit easy and relax. But
what started with an intention of relaxing therapy ended up in something else.
I was initially surprised to see this side of her personality; it was the first
time I saw her this way. I guess it was the only way in which she could loosen
her minds grip over her heart. Perhaps the best way some may say. Finally when
she was totally drunk and on clouds-9 she her heart finally conquered her mind
and all she said was “from now on we are a couple!!!!”
To which my obvious reply was “alright!!”.
I think she needed to get high to say it, and I am glad
that we did it. It isn’t that it was never gonna happen but would have happened
a bit late. I was very happy initially but as time went by I realise I was
losing my significance in her life. Somehow I felt she was taking me for
granted and won’t give me enough attention. I never had any fancy expectation
when I say about attention but atleast enough to say that we are still
together. Things were dily-dolly for a year or so.
I felt that she
was suddenly starting to become bhav khau. I know it sounds very rude but thing
were actually starting to become tough to manage. Mainly because my conscious
wasn’t allowing me to be in such a thing were i wasn’t being respected. A point
came where things seemed like going above the threshold. Although it was tough,
and sounds rude now but it was something that had to be done.
I remember we met at Sirocco. I was assuming that this would
be our last meet, as it was the very intention with which I wished to meet her.
Upon meeting her I explained her, my state of mind at that moment. It was
tougher than it is sounding now. I told her what I was thinking about their
current situation and the reasons behind his thoughts as well.
I felt it was better to part ways as both of them were
not on the same tangent. Well I guess she liked things to be dramatic in life.
maybe she was just confused or atleast not sure. But she cried, like all girls
always do. I think it was the time when she realise that even she loved me, and
perhaps my intention of moving out triggered this feeling.
And when you realise
a person who loves you is choosing to give up on love because he feels that you
don’t respect that feeling pings a sense of fear. This is the fear of losing
someone special in your life.
It like you are losing something good, something even
better than your own self. The evening
ended on a rather opposite note with respect to how it began. We decided to
give each a second chance and since then it has been the best times of our life.
It has been three years since that incident and our bond
has grown stronger. Stronger than ever and there is a mutual respect that we
have for each other as well. We don’t get much time to spend together, you know
how the life in big city like Mumbai is. But still whenever we get we have the
best times.
We like to explore new places, new hangouts and places to
have cocktails and enjoy variety of food. I am surer than before that we have
found our soulmates. And even caste is not an issue for us since we both are of
same caste.
All lights are green for us and all we need is a go ahead
from our parents. And I know that it will be a yes from them too, because
ishitaa (with a double ‘a’) is the best girl for me. We are compatible in all
respects and our love has stood the test of times, faced the challenges it
threw on us and emerged stronger and firmer than before. I am sure our parents
would acknowledge it and bless us for a
prolonged life ahead of us together.
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Thoughts and views of Rohan Jain.
Words and sketch of Ignatius Lewis.
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