It was Saturday

It was 4.55 pm. Time seemed like passing very quickly. I looked around and everyone seemed in a hurry. Head swaying left right and people whispering. The whispering grew louder and louder as time when by. People asking last minute questions also good time to understand the fundamentals of long distance data exchange and mutual understanding and team work.

My paper was almost done and there was just enough time to write the second part of last question. I guess there are two techniques to write a exam paper. i.e either super ‘rattafication’ or super awesome speed.

Trust me 3 hours and 6 questions is a very tough ask. Good writing speed was a “MUST HAVE” thing for us.

I mostly relied on speed and creativity and concept. The type of technique commonly explained as “tying the goat around the tree and explaining tree”. Very famous and very effective technique I must say.

I could have wrote the answer in due time but I did a mistake of looking at my fastrack wrist watch which was gifted to me by a very special person. And then it happened. Shivering hands, deviated vision and a total mental lock-down. Everything froze but my hands were still writing. It was just too hard to believe in approximately 4 mins from now everything is getting over.

I had been waiting for this moment to come in my life since very long and now when it almost here all am doing is trying to explain some stupid point on fidelity and diversity w.r.t to computer communication system.

“Oh come now, you wrote like almost 5 questions. Let go it and feel the joy of this moment” one part of my brain said.

“Don’t you dare listen to that lazy creature. It for the last time you are writing an exam paper anyway. Finish it off with a bang!”

In this fight of mind weather to write or not I ended up doing a blunder of “oh shit!!” level.

I ended up writing a prayer in middle of answer. And before I could take any corrective action the invigilator was standing on my tomb with his hands stretching out and as I delayed a few seconds her expression changed like I was stealing right under her nose. And then in split second she snatched the paper right under my pen and thats it. The moment came and went just like that.

That time I felt like I am walking in slow motion and everyone is running and sprinting around me, it felt like infinity. It is here and I am in it.

I instantly knelled right in the middle of the class and said 'our Father' and 'hail Mary'.

Everyone understood hence no one interrupted me. This was my moment, my space and my zenith.

While praying a small voice creped in my head

“This is the feeling of success”

“This is what happens when you feel happy”

And then nothing mattered. Be failures of past, depressing memories, forgettable moments, sense of dissatisfaction or punishments caused by mind on body. None of it mattered they came and just vanished as the smile on my face grew brighter and wider.

Then all I was left with was an absolute sense of bliss, grace and achievement.

Jesus Christ! Saturday never felt so relaxing neither before nor after that.

Although in the biggest war of my life circumstances, world and negativity did win many battles and gave me serious kicking but ultimately the united states of Ignatius Lewis has won the war. Life tried to give me a Total Knock-out but it failed. The major casualties of this war were dreams, Time and friends. I feel I lost many in this war.

The journey from 53% to 74% was not easy. Some hurdles life added some I introduced myself. Now was the moment of acceptance and forgiveness.

By the time I stepped out of the class I had made peace with my mind, conscious and life. I felt like I was in this state of introspection for hours but it was only 5.10 pm.

And then snapped!

My friends brought me into reality by giving a really tight hug and almost crushed my ribs and I was still laughing. And then all I could hear was

“daru !!….daru !!….daru !!….daru !!…”

It was the sound of 100 odd vocal chords shouting the same word over and over and over again with increasing decibels in every repeat.

It was the Saturday I made truce with myself and now we both are ready to fight this world.

“Together”

 thank you dear friends.

please post a feedback or comment below.

If today is your birthday.

“oh no! Not again” was this your first reaction after reading this heading?

Well I couldn't find anything more suitable to entitle this write-up of mine. I know its kind of used up line. Seriously there is nothing that can be added into this as fair share of thing have been written, wrote said by many people from superstars to spiritual leaders. So i am not sure whether my thoughts would even contribute a single drop in this huge ocean.

If you think I am adding anything new or something that could reveal some sort of secret I guess you would be terribly disappointed after reading this. This is just stray thought that came in my mind which inspired me to write this.

To be very honest birthday is a very special day in ones life. There are various reasons for it but the main would be that this day not only brings happiness in your life but so many people apart from you too feel the joys effect of this day.  Probably, a direct God’s gift, something that you receive as soon as you are born i.e  chance to brighten other life with just your mere existence.

A ridiculous theory that my mind came up with was since god is always preoccupied with the keep so many people away from sadness which could be really pain in the ass. So he distributes his job of keeping everyone happy ONE BIRTHDAY AT A TIME. Isn’t it true that so many people feels happy when its your birthday. If any given day you ask your parent which was the happiest day in their life, hands down they will say that the day you were born.

Happiness of your friends is mostly oriented towards satisfying there taste buds with all kind of flavored indulgences and taking a dive in the booze tank. But however mode they chose to express it they are happy aren’t they? Only contradiction to it would be the “Gyani vyaktis” vision of happiness which according to them is unconditional. But in planet earth the most endangered species are these Gyani-vyakti.

But honestly happiness is the only good thing that one can spread in this world and your birthday gives you LICENSE TO THRILL. It’s like the bhrama-astra or the ultimate weapon to make anyone smile.

Take the test just go to anyone and say “it’s my birthday today.” That’s it.

Trust me happy would be the first word that will come out of mouth straight from the heart with a long smile and bright eyes. Just give it a try if you wanna make someone happy. Also who has the time to cross check the validity of you birthday claim.

Now here is a secret of mine that am sharing with you. I enjoy the birthdays of my friends and family more than I enjoy my own. March and April are like the worst time to have birthdays because its exam time always. So there you go I confess it.

On a very serious note its like an excuse for us to be happy and dress up in your best clothes, buy the best possible gift, give hard ass kicking (a.k.a birthday bums), icing make-ups and cold drink baths.

Although you love them little and swear a lot at that moment, but they mean it when they say

“happy birthday and god bless you dear”

And what they get in return is priceless. Be it a blushing thank you, a million dollar smile or an emotional swearing hug. These things can make even dead laugh and make your day the happiest day of your life.

Like Christmas is the day of giving, holi is a day of sharing similarly birthday is the day to accept. Whatever small, big or nothing others give you. Bershram hoke accept kar lena. And before going to bed just close your eyes and thank the almighty for you are some of those few lucky one who made it to see this day and make a wish for yourself and a promise too.

Everyone is precious and special. You even more than what you think you are. Make it count.

Happy birthday! Dear.

feedback and comments can be written below.

SLAMBOOK

Bhurrr….bhurr….bhurr…bhurrr….

“What the hell”. It was my mobile buzzing. Initially I couldn't remember why I set an alarm as early as 4.30 in morning.

“oh shit!!” the reason then come gushing in my mind.

“She is leaving today. I must hurry!!”

Well it was advent of summer still i could fell the chills that early in morning as I left my place. Destination being Nagpur railway station, sights and scene of Nagpur in night is to die for.. Her train was departing from platform 1, AC boggy number 3. Just to be sure I called her up even though the platform was relatively empty with few people & surprisingly clean too.

And there she was! Wearing super fit jeans, shoes and double layered jacket. She looked fat in them but trust me she not at all fat. She could make any girl feel conscious about herself. She was short, fit and cute. Looking at her smiling would make me thank god everyday for sending her in my life.

Her father an army intelligence officer was also present there. God ! he always made me feel uncomfortable. There were many qualities unique to her which transpired into me too. Like the way we use to fight for the last bit of already melted kulfi. And those fight were intense and serious and a regular phenomenon. It feels really stupid now when I look back on those fights. Another thing that used to annoy me a lot was whenever we had indulged in pani-puri feasts she somehow used to manage her way out to pay the bill. This used to really piss me off. The only way for me to pay those bills was by doing an advance payments.

“Jesus Christ she was such a jerk”

There is something about these army daughters that excites me a lot. But she was way too cute to be a typical army daughter. There was this one instant when we were reading our sign-outs. I think it was the scene rather than what was written that made her senti. A black puppy somehow managed to get his head stuck in a plastic bottle and he was screaming.

She wanted to help him but she was too scared to get near that puppy. Scared and concerned at the same time. When I went ahead to help him she started screaming and crying.

“oh my god! Stop it you stupid you are hurting him…” first and then “jaldi …karo…jaldi..karo”.

The puppy was dirty and I somehow managed to get his head out of it and threw the bottle after crushing it.

And when I turned towards her she was socked in tears and crying like hell

“stop crying… or should I buy you a lollipop” I laughed.

As I approached her she slapped me and hugged me.

“That was really stupid, you idiot” she continued.

“well it worked na?” I asked

Then she wiped her tears on my shirt and sleeves and sucked her nose in.

Later she said “this is a very nice shirt. White color suits you.”

“ha ha ha…it was…. Teri lollipop pakki ho gayi” I laughed.

“but your deodorant is really pathetic” she murmured.

“well that’s the dog smell” I whispered and she slapped me hard in arm and was laughing while crying at the same time like a baby. Amazing days I tell you they were.

While remembering these stories I say her army intelligence father starring at me. Trust me these army guys are good in what they do. Well coming back to present the main reason for me being there was to get my SLAMBOOK back from her. we talked a little and then it was time. She bid farewell buy hugging her parents and just said BYE to me after giving me my SLAMBOOK.

“that’s way too simple to say bye” I thought.

To my surprise when I open it it was all filled up. I was so happy and glad.

The last two lines written in it was

THE SHIRT WAS ACTUALLY NICE !!!.....AND THE DOGGY ODORED GUY IN IT TOO. WHERE YOU HITTING ON ME???

Rest is not important. I had already started to miss her and train hadn’t even left the platform.

Will miss you all guys. This one special is dedicated to those entire how shared my life and making it what it is today “A SLAMBOOK FILLED WITH EXPRESSION OF HAPPINESS”.

feedback comments are welcome below.

SUMMER CALLING!!

Cold days have almost bid farewell to us and things are really starting to get heated up. If you ask me the best nights are summer nights. Why? I don’t know maybe they have a real cozy feeling about them. These were the thoughts that started to trickle in my mind while I was sitting on the lawn of my college.
I never really understood why people never sat on them. They are not that bad. There was a strong breeze of warm air a little higher from the green mate and a cold and addictive soft wind near to the green grass surface and as I starred towards the college building from a place I have never seen it, it was mesmerizing.
But it felt different. The type of feeling you get when you know things are moving ahead. Just how you feel when you look at the second’s arms of the clock that you are wearing when it’s ticking. Exactly the same feeling is brought about by summer.
For some summer means ice-cream, cold drinks, nimbu pani, exams, vacations, sweat and cooler. Yes its exactly the same thing but if you ask me, this time SUMMER means TRANSITION.
A time when even trees let go of there old leaves. Summer is nature’s way of indication that’s its time to let go of old things and preparing to welcome new and fresh things. That’s why I said summer means transition, when we migrate from old and welcome new.
This how you feel when you are writing on a page and last 4-5 lines is left. Kind of a dilemmatic situation where you don’t want to write further more on that page as you know new page is just a turn away where you can start fresh and neat. On the contrary you don’t want to exit that current page as it hold memories of past. I refer such feeling as SUMMER CALLING!!!
The significance of summer in our life is like the significance of a candle in a dark room. The candle itself is very small as compared to the vast darkness and size of the room.
On the other hand although a candle separately has a very minimal effect but when its taken in a dark room its value surprisingly increases. It eliminates darkness subtlety but effectively where it is taken.
Such is the importance of summer in life cycle of earth.
It enhances the importance of winter and monsoon. A feature no other season is gifted with. Strangely it’s neither as loud and as dramatic as the monsoon nor as demanding and dull as winter.
Summer is subtle. No doubt it’s harsh and strict too but it doesn’t mind when you pray for rain and cold winds in his kingdom.
Summer is hot and magical. You will feel its magic working.
Don’t hate summer! It’s a catalyst for other seasons.
Happy birthday to me!!
feedback and comments are welcome.... it s my birthday so do remember to wish me....

TO THE FATHER OF THE GIRL

Here is a letter that I found a few days back in a carol book at a church. I excluded the names as I don't want the identities to be the highlight of this write-up. It was found in a carol book at a very prestigious church. Hope you all like it.

Hello sir, I am not very habitual with stuffs like this but still m trying. Please ignore the grammatical errors. The intention behind writing this to you is to convey the message. Forgive the messenger if it misses a few ‘p’ and adds some extra ‘t’. Also keep in mind everything written by me was done with full respect and dignity kept in mind.

I know you are the lucky father of the person who is the luckiest to me. It’s not easy to be a father of a girl. I am saying this because even I am going to be a father someday and I sincerely hope that God bless me with a lovely child like your daughter. i may not have the right to comment on your daughter but I would really like to cash-in this opportunity now that in this conversation only two persons are involved one speaking other listening.

I wanted to tell you that you are a proud father of an even prouder girl. It’s not that easy to raise a girl child but I must say you did a splendid job. You love your daughter a lot and you don’t want anything wrong or won’t let anything bad happen to her. That’s why every girl looks up to their father in a very respectful way and I bet you must be the first superhero for her. Maybe greater than GOD who provides and protects her. I can surely say that she has accumulated most of your qualities and those qualities have brought me near to her.

She is very special for me just the way she is special to you. With all due respect I could never be what you are to her. You know your daughter in and out and its true m very new. But from whatever I know her I would never try to hurt her nor do anything without her consent.

Your daughter has changed my life in a very beautiful way. Making me realize that if you want you can influence other people’s life in a very subtle and positive way. There are few short-comings in me but there are few in you, your wife and even in your daughter and one should compliment others imperfection and that’s how things rotate in this universe. I believe imperfection brings uniqueness in a person’s character. I like the imperfections that daughter has. This is an honest truth and I dare not to rectify them because they make her who she is. I am honored to have known a person who is so beautiful at mind, honest at heart and simple in approaches to life. There were many instants I tried to hate your daughter but it couldn’t last for more than few hours. Your daughter is super-amazingly simple and special at the same time.

Just like my mother and father. They brought me up with sacrificing their own happiness and with sweat and tears. From them I learned to love and respect and also to take care of others like they are your own. Something very clearly written in Ramayana and m sure it’s written in bible at more than one instant. The most important pillars of any relationship are love, respect and trust. I love your daughter and it’s divine. But more than that I respect her for who she is because respect takes a higher seat than love and trust in my life where trust is the foundation of everything above. All I am asking is a chance and if you still think m not worth your daughter then you would be right.

The other day I saw you sitting with this carol book and at this very place and I know you always sit here. I sneaked in few times during your Sunday morning just to be sure. How to know if you are that person?

Its simple you are the honored father of the most beautiful looking girl in this entire St. WXYZ church. The girl who is the owner of a very simple golden chain and uses nothing to groom herself because she is beautiful in just the way she is and you know that too.

If you are the father of that blesses child all I am asking is some space in your heart for me.

If you are not – thanks for reading this but please put this letter back from where you took it and keep the carol book where it was or else that old man would never know that he is the luckiest and proudest man in this world to love that girl.

(Hopefully) Yours respectfully

The second most

Lucky guy in the world

That someone....

hello there! Here is one very beautiful creation of one of my very good and close friend KISHORE PATHAK. just colud not resist fro putting this on my blog. hope you guys like it and appreciate it equally.

I was in flight, was going to onsite once again. was very happy plane takes off, n takes me to the sky.
I looked outside the window, nice evening scene, feels like heaven. I just lost myself in that beauty. someone’s voice disturbed me “excuse me sir, would you like to have something?”
I turned back, and was surprise to see my beautiful old schoolmate,
Avanti.
“Hey Avanti, is that you, how come you… wow, you looks still the
same, pretty.. in this Air-hostess suit”
“Pankaj, wo…..w, I can’t believe this is you.. ohh sorry I am on my
job, will talk to you later”
she left smile on my face. I couldn’t believe in my eyes, It reminded
me my school days memories. How crazy I was about her, always followed her after the school,
wrote love letters, but never dared to give one of them. Always
looking at her in the class, from last bench. she was the queen of our class. I fought with 2-3 other guys for her, how stupid I was. I couldn’t stop myself, looking at her again, I was amazed to see that, she became more beautiful then she were at school.
she too looked at me and smile, then she said something to her fellow air-hostess, then they both started smiling. I was clueless that wat happened. her colleague was also damn pretty.
Oh my god, today you fulfil one of my dream.
I thought of going there and having chat with her, but I knew that, it’s her job,
so I stopped myself.
again started looking outside the window. we were above the clouds making an awesome scene outside,
also inside, because of her smile.
I got some courage, and pretended that I am going towards toilet. I looked at her, she understood what I desired. she came toward me and said : “extremely sorry yaar, I couldn’t talk to you much,
so say how are you, where have you been these many years, and what’s
your success story?
for what purpose you are going?”
“hmmm…
I was always there, it was you who left everything after school, I searched you, so many places wherever I could, but no existence of you. then I completed my college, got a job in such a nice company,
I didn’t know, my company will give me this much, still I m going for an onsite job, don’t know when will return back. you know, I got everything in my life except someone, with whom I can actually share my world, my success.
someone…”
I looked straight into her eyes.. those blue eyes, I think she got the answer,
who is that ’someone’ with some pain in her eyes, she said, “sorry got to go, will give you my number”
I again, sat back to my seat, very silent, looking outside, and hoping some answer. it was dark outside by that time, some thunder in cloud, just like inside my heart.
then suddenly, plane started getting hiccups.. everyone got scared..I saw Avanti running towards mic, she made an announcement, that don’t be panic as they are facing a storm outside. but plane started shaking badly, everyone started feeling it’s the last moment of their lives…
I keep on watching Avanti, and she to me…
then something hit my back hard.. and there was a complete darkness in front of me..deep silent, but I could still feel the shaking plane, and people’s scream..
then someone shouted… ‘Pankaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaj !!!!!’
“Panky, wake up you are again sleeping in office, wake up”
Damn.. I looked here-there, same ODC, no Onsite, no plane.. no Avanti..

I stared at my colleague “Jai” in anger.. Because of you only, that plane crashed!!

created by:- Kishore. Pathak.

Larsen & Toubro Infotech Ltd.
Chennai

HERE MY WAY OF WISHING YOU ALL A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS. Enjoy the holiday. Feedback and comments are welcome.

Please lend me your hand.

“mone zakale onnu help cheiuvamma da?” an elderly voice broke the serene envelop of silence around me. I am not habitual to listen to such complicated words that too at supersonic speed. By the time my mind got hold of first letter, the entire sentence was over.
I was sitting of the left hand side of the grotto in seminary hills in a semi sitting and semi kneeling position a kind of ‘Aasanaa’. Apart from occasional clatter of children and crying of babies its quiet. But this got my eyes opened to look around.
To add to my surprise I saw an elderly man starring towards me. To tell you the truth the man wore everything white from hair to shirt and strangely even a white LUNGI. I dragged my backpack close to me thinking maybe its lying in his way.
He smiled at me after looking this and again repeated the same sentence
“mone zakale onnu help cheiuvamma da….?”
And there was a big question mark all over my face.
“Excuse me??!!” I reactively replied.
The man asked “Ni Malayalam samsari kumma?”
My face got relaxed after hearing it.
“No no malayalam….only English…...and hindi” I said.
The old busted into laugh maybe because the way I replied to his question, like a foreigner.
“I mean to say could you lend your hand for a minute” he said
“yes absolutely” I said
I saw a super old lady sitting there i understood she is the wife. He man held her one hand and uttered something and I was ready with on the other side with my hands. The lady stood up and with the support of our hands. She could barely walk and somehow slowly and carefully we managed to get her down from the first set of 12 steps of the grotto.
As we slowly approached the next set stairs a group of people hurried towards us and another young man smiled and took her hands from me. I thought that they are family and so I turned around to leave.
The old man again called for me
“yes sir!” I hurriedly replied.
He smiled and said “thank you munna”.
“Please don't say it. It's nothing” I said.
“ joyin us for lunch”
“whats the occasion” I inquired.
“oh!! Its our 52nd wedding anniversary” he said smiling.
My eyes stuck to its place as I couldn't believe what I heard and as I was trying to calculate there present age accordingly. 52nd !!! you got to be joking.
He again laughed and patted on my back and took me along.
“its our 52nd anniversary and our youngest son was blessed with a baby last week so we decided t have a family prayer and lunch here. You helped us out so join us”.
“Do you still love your wife?” I couldn't believe I just said that. It’s a kind of thing that can land you in deep trouble and invite a public thrashing. He gave me a angry look and I instantly bite my tongue.
He then smiled and replied “of course I do munna!! So what if she's old and fat and faces difficulty in walking, even am not salman khan”
I felt that he was making fun of my stupid question and even I felt pity for myself.
“we were blessed with 3 sons and a lovely daughter giving birth to 4 children and growing them up takes a lot out of a women. Maybe somewhere I myself is responsible for her present condition” he started and then it was he speaking and I listening.
“I know her for past 52 years longest than anyone in her life” as the old lady was escorted by her family
“she trusts me more than GOD. I stand by her today just the way I did 52 years ago. I cannot let go of her just because she old and weak and not that good looking as she was 5 decades back.”
He continued “we took a promise in front of GOD that we’ll take care of each other in sickness and in health. Then why let go now? ”
“we spent the best years of our life when her hands were soft and mine strong. The day I held her hands for the first time I decided I am not going to let go of it...what ever happens.”
I thought he is actually making some sense as he continued “Its a sign of trust and belonging”.
“don’t love anyone for a reason. You people think of yourself as super smart kids. But am telling that you all are stupid. You are stupid because you don’t know the meaning of love. You relate it with looks and style and height and clothes. Its all physical to you people and you think it will remain forever. Right munna??!!”.
I laughed at the way he called me munna and so did he along with me. It was a very loud laugh.
This caught attention of one of is son and he shouted “Acha, vanamakku pokkum”.
“well munna just remember if you see yourself getting old with a person that means that you are in love with that person. That’s true and divine”.
I was cemented on the bench as his son escorted him towards dinning place. He turned around and said “you got it munna?” and started to laugh with his son.
“come lets have food..” he said in typical malayali accent and we walked together.
Well the message is clear itself. If you think about anyone in this way the YES you are in love.