That someone....

hello there! Here is one very beautiful creation of one of my very good and close friend KISHORE PATHAK. just colud not resist fro putting this on my blog. hope you guys like it and appreciate it equally.

I was in flight, was going to onsite once again. was very happy plane takes off, n takes me to the sky.
I looked outside the window, nice evening scene, feels like heaven. I just lost myself in that beauty. someone’s voice disturbed me “excuse me sir, would you like to have something?”
I turned back, and was surprise to see my beautiful old schoolmate,
Avanti.
“Hey Avanti, is that you, how come you… wow, you looks still the
same, pretty.. in this Air-hostess suit”
“Pankaj, wo…..w, I can’t believe this is you.. ohh sorry I am on my
job, will talk to you later”
she left smile on my face. I couldn’t believe in my eyes, It reminded
me my school days memories. How crazy I was about her, always followed her after the school,
wrote love letters, but never dared to give one of them. Always
looking at her in the class, from last bench. she was the queen of our class. I fought with 2-3 other guys for her, how stupid I was. I couldn’t stop myself, looking at her again, I was amazed to see that, she became more beautiful then she were at school.
she too looked at me and smile, then she said something to her fellow air-hostess, then they both started smiling. I was clueless that wat happened. her colleague was also damn pretty.
Oh my god, today you fulfil one of my dream.
I thought of going there and having chat with her, but I knew that, it’s her job,
so I stopped myself.
again started looking outside the window. we were above the clouds making an awesome scene outside,
also inside, because of her smile.
I got some courage, and pretended that I am going towards toilet. I looked at her, she understood what I desired. she came toward me and said : “extremely sorry yaar, I couldn’t talk to you much,
so say how are you, where have you been these many years, and what’s
your success story?
for what purpose you are going?”
“hmmm…
I was always there, it was you who left everything after school, I searched you, so many places wherever I could, but no existence of you. then I completed my college, got a job in such a nice company,
I didn’t know, my company will give me this much, still I m going for an onsite job, don’t know when will return back. you know, I got everything in my life except someone, with whom I can actually share my world, my success.
someone…”
I looked straight into her eyes.. those blue eyes, I think she got the answer,
who is that ’someone’ with some pain in her eyes, she said, “sorry got to go, will give you my number”
I again, sat back to my seat, very silent, looking outside, and hoping some answer. it was dark outside by that time, some thunder in cloud, just like inside my heart.
then suddenly, plane started getting hiccups.. everyone got scared..I saw Avanti running towards mic, she made an announcement, that don’t be panic as they are facing a storm outside. but plane started shaking badly, everyone started feeling it’s the last moment of their lives…
I keep on watching Avanti, and she to me…
then something hit my back hard.. and there was a complete darkness in front of me..deep silent, but I could still feel the shaking plane, and people’s scream..
then someone shouted… ‘Pankaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaj !!!!!’
“Panky, wake up you are again sleeping in office, wake up”
Damn.. I looked here-there, same ODC, no Onsite, no plane.. no Avanti..

I stared at my colleague “Jai” in anger.. Because of you only, that plane crashed!!

created by:- Kishore. Pathak.

Larsen & Toubro Infotech Ltd.
Chennai

HERE MY WAY OF WISHING YOU ALL A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS. Enjoy the holiday. Feedback and comments are welcome.

Please lend me your hand.

“mone zakale onnu help cheiuvamma da?” an elderly voice broke the serene envelop of silence around me. I am not habitual to listen to such complicated words that too at supersonic speed. By the time my mind got hold of first letter, the entire sentence was over.
I was sitting of the left hand side of the grotto in seminary hills in a semi sitting and semi kneeling position a kind of ‘Aasanaa’. Apart from occasional clatter of children and crying of babies its quiet. But this got my eyes opened to look around.
To add to my surprise I saw an elderly man starring towards me. To tell you the truth the man wore everything white from hair to shirt and strangely even a white LUNGI. I dragged my backpack close to me thinking maybe its lying in his way.
He smiled at me after looking this and again repeated the same sentence
“mone zakale onnu help cheiuvamma da….?”
And there was a big question mark all over my face.
“Excuse me??!!” I reactively replied.
The man asked “Ni Malayalam samsari kumma?”
My face got relaxed after hearing it.
“No no malayalam….only English…...and hindi” I said.
The old busted into laugh maybe because the way I replied to his question, like a foreigner.
“I mean to say could you lend your hand for a minute” he said
“yes absolutely” I said
I saw a super old lady sitting there i understood she is the wife. He man held her one hand and uttered something and I was ready with on the other side with my hands. The lady stood up and with the support of our hands. She could barely walk and somehow slowly and carefully we managed to get her down from the first set of 12 steps of the grotto.
As we slowly approached the next set stairs a group of people hurried towards us and another young man smiled and took her hands from me. I thought that they are family and so I turned around to leave.
The old man again called for me
“yes sir!” I hurriedly replied.
He smiled and said “thank you munna”.
“Please don't say it. It's nothing” I said.
“ joyin us for lunch”
“whats the occasion” I inquired.
“oh!! Its our 52nd wedding anniversary” he said smiling.
My eyes stuck to its place as I couldn't believe what I heard and as I was trying to calculate there present age accordingly. 52nd !!! you got to be joking.
He again laughed and patted on my back and took me along.
“its our 52nd anniversary and our youngest son was blessed with a baby last week so we decided t have a family prayer and lunch here. You helped us out so join us”.
“Do you still love your wife?” I couldn't believe I just said that. It’s a kind of thing that can land you in deep trouble and invite a public thrashing. He gave me a angry look and I instantly bite my tongue.
He then smiled and replied “of course I do munna!! So what if she's old and fat and faces difficulty in walking, even am not salman khan”
I felt that he was making fun of my stupid question and even I felt pity for myself.
“we were blessed with 3 sons and a lovely daughter giving birth to 4 children and growing them up takes a lot out of a women. Maybe somewhere I myself is responsible for her present condition” he started and then it was he speaking and I listening.
“I know her for past 52 years longest than anyone in her life” as the old lady was escorted by her family
“she trusts me more than GOD. I stand by her today just the way I did 52 years ago. I cannot let go of her just because she old and weak and not that good looking as she was 5 decades back.”
He continued “we took a promise in front of GOD that we’ll take care of each other in sickness and in health. Then why let go now? ”
“we spent the best years of our life when her hands were soft and mine strong. The day I held her hands for the first time I decided I am not going to let go of it...what ever happens.”
I thought he is actually making some sense as he continued “Its a sign of trust and belonging”.
“don’t love anyone for a reason. You people think of yourself as super smart kids. But am telling that you all are stupid. You are stupid because you don’t know the meaning of love. You relate it with looks and style and height and clothes. Its all physical to you people and you think it will remain forever. Right munna??!!”.
I laughed at the way he called me munna and so did he along with me. It was a very loud laugh.
This caught attention of one of is son and he shouted “Acha, vanamakku pokkum”.
“well munna just remember if you see yourself getting old with a person that means that you are in love with that person. That’s true and divine”.
I was cemented on the bench as his son escorted him towards dinning place. He turned around and said “you got it munna?” and started to laugh with his son.
“come lets have food..” he said in typical malayali accent and we walked together.
Well the message is clear itself. If you think about anyone in this way the YES you are in love.

TO BE HANGED….. TILL DAWN!!!!

Hello everyone, here I am again. I know it has been quiet a while since posted my last article but circumstances were not conducive to do any recreational activity. And the after effects were so deep that it took me a while to get over it. But now I am back and the best feedback I could get is when my long time friends call me and enquire why I haven’t posted any new posts on my blog. Thanks guys for motivating and driving me to write more and more.
I know its very auspicious time of the year and the season of festival reaches its pinnacle with amazing festival of DIWALI one of the most anticipated festivals of the entire India. A lot of things are going around everywhere and some how everyone is busy in doing something or the other. On the other hand here I am. I mean if on the eve of diwali if I am writing for my blog than you can imagine the level of participation and occupancy by me in this festival. I never fancied DIWALI like others do. I don’t know why…
One thing that really caught my eye this time around was the level of decoration I have seen in Nagpur. I don’t know if this thing was there in past but I have noticed it this time around very profoundly. I mean it is amazing and super good looking. Specially mentioning the hanging lightings in front of THE TIMES OF INDIA office and SATHE jewelers and ‘JP heights’ in Byramji town is incredible. A sight very promising at the time of economic slowdown. Special mention goes to all those who hanged there lightings on trees, its something very appreciable. They are very eye-catching and instant attention grabbing thing. Type of thing that’s really catching and it just brightens your eyes in an instant and makes your normal evening into something very bright and beautiful.
Simple, yet stunning. I really like the ones which are orange, blue and red colors.
Most would be the simple orange golden colored series of lightings which creates an amazing ambience around itself. I feel that if you are using this series you don’t need any other colors of lightings. If you want to see such a glow and luminosity then do go to TIMES OF INDIA office. I really really like it.
I think this is a much better, greener and safer way to show your happiness for this festival. I think the ad which says “DO DIYE ZADA JALAO” also sends the same message. Instead of wasting money on crackers it would be really advisable that we do it this way. Please say no to crackers “diwali roshni ka tayohar hai” so lightings lagao, roshni karo, andhere ko dur karo, but please noise pollution is not diwali. Instead buy sweets, buy lightings, recharge your phone and call your friends instead, and give that extra money to someone needy if not do call me I will suggest better alternatives. Even you know that your crackers budget could make someones diwali brighter and happier.
Happy DIWALI to all and enjoy your holiday.
Feedback, wishes, comments and SWEETS are welcome.

THE LEAKING ROOF

Hello friends I am back and I know it has been quiet a while since I posted my last article on my blog and there are like a gazillion reasons for it. But honestly mujhe kuch mil hi nahi raha tha thats why and I don't know weather the heading has any relevance with this article too

I feel there are so many things in life that you carve for. So much so that you are ready to do anything to get it. You think you want those things as if your life depends on them. For me it may be my dream company TCS or a galaxy tab phone or MBA from a certain college. But as they say not all things are under your control. I feel that in correcting the things that has gone bad and the process of trying to find an effective remedy to it takes you so very far away from yourself. This thing makes you somewhat weak and then there occurs uncertainty and doubts on our decisions. At this time our very own self comes to our rescue, the real you.

This is where the title “the leaking roof” spells its meaning out.

(funda zada ho gaya na!!!) frankly its an attempt to explain you how I felt few days back. I didn't get a particular type of job in an event in my college which I needed and I was carving for it big time.

But instead I ended up doing an altogether different thing. My childhood love and in due course of time I almost forgot that it’s a thing i love most. If it wasn't supposed to happen this way then I could have missed the chance to play a very significant role in creating something so beautiful, amazing and artistic like the ETHOS hanging and Audi-backdrop. I enjoyed doing it very much and I felt exactly how I use to feel when I was a 12 yr old doing drawing and painting in my beloved school. Playing with colors and creating my imagination.

You know no matter how hard you try to cover your cracks to stop the leaks, it will eventually leak. Meaning no matter how hard you try to run away from your true self the ultimate sense of achievement and fulfillment comes when you try finding the ways back to your self. We try become new and project ourselves differently but the best part of you lies within yourself and that path, although difficult to track but not impossible.

Remember, your true self will some how leak through your sham crack and it will eventually triumph.

If you ask me, I don’t mind having such a leak…..coz it helped me to have romance with my forgotten first love once again…..and that too in a very grand and colorful way and got appreciation for it too……imagine!!!

Special thanks to ETHOS-11 “decoration and hanging committee” for including me and accommodating my views and opinion to create something so amazing……

How I meet myself

There are moments in you life when you try finding the true destination for your life. Although it’s not necessary it would come when you are ready. We are always so busy running behind thing that we forget what actually we want. You work hard to achieve something and when you’re done with it you realize this not what you thought it would be.
These things ponder your mind while sitting in a cubical section in library and you see boards of “DO NOT DISTURB!!” hanging all around.
On the contrary life is not supposed to be like this. I believe life offers everyone everything although not in the same time and amount, but it does. What you take out of it really makes the story of your life. And when it throws an opportunity towards you to add a new chapter to your story you should take it and if it does, priorities of other things shouldn’t matter.
And I believe you don’t have to go far away for new things. A recent trip that I made with the YES+ team was I believe a very significant chapter in my life. A group having different backgrounds, cultures, age and religions. The factor uniting us was we want to enjoy life in the best possible way and it is done by accepting others existence around you and find some reason to be happy in the darkest moments of life.
The place was a small village where only way to stay connected with the external world was small gauge railway line. I never knew those thing still run. Riding that small train was fun and there are very few times when you actually feel proud of Indian railways and this was one such.
I know the sense of going out or seeing something new excites us but the smile and happiness that you see on people's faces was the best thing and living one of your fantasies makes you fell elevated and it was visible on each and every face that occupied that 38 seater boggy. You can understand the gravity of the feeling that more than 50% of all the snaps are taken in and around the train itself and the smile width never reduced in any snap.
The place itself was so amazing, simple, unhampered and unadulterated that you are bound to like it.
Far way from all the hustle of city, creamy silence to heal your senses, and beauty to die for are some ways to describe it. Even the people there are so simple that you obviously feel comfortable around them and when you do group meditation there right in the middle of the nature undisturbed and united with nature you actually discover yourself.
At least I did when I sat on the edge of the dried waterfall as if I was sitting right in the middle of hell and heaven. I can tell you that I had never felt this way before in my entire life. A mixed feeling of fear, peace, happiness, elevation, calm, emptiness and filled up all at the same time. These thing makes you realize that there is more in you than what you know and sometimes such experiences makes you introspect on what you have and what are you are running after. You see the true you, not the one who you show. I know there is something divine looking at me and that thing made me go there coz I felt it was very much needed.
Sitting there I realize that I have a aim, a faith, a heart, a life, people I love and a personality and with these thing I can achieve anything.
While sitting next to a new YES+ teacher I felt that when you accept people the way they are thing in life become very easy. Everyone falls so don’t hesitate in asking for a helping hand in such times. We shared our failures she gave me some valuable thoughts to think on. I know she was right. And I thank her that. Sometimes you have to run away for a while to get hold of things. Apart from this it all boils down to the fact that some one you meet just few hours back ask you to smile for a snap then there is something in you.
So meeting a new person is like meeting yourself again through that person. That’s what happened to all of us in gallows of a dried waterfall on a day stolen from my busy life by myself to meet myself again” Hi!! My name is Ignatius Lewis, meet the new me!!”
feedbacks are welcomed....

The first letter of Rain.

Dear beloved,
I was expecting a good rainy day and rain gods disappointed me. The worst thing was it was raining right from the morning to late night also its frequency was not same throughout the day. Got up early and it was already raining since early morning and by the time I decided to go to gym it became very grayish and light rain was pondering.
The roads were empty except for those overloaded auto rickshaws running late for schools. It reminded me of my school days when even we too used to cramp in such autos saying our rhymes and table of 9. I came back and decided not to go to college as weather was too good to spent it in a class room but it was not to happen. Some urgent work needed my attention so had to run and no wonder my bike too had same intention and she gave up on me in hard rain and at the middle of now where. The only shelter was a thin shade of tree. Well I wanted to hurry thing up but was helpless. Stranded doing nothing I saw a puppy shivering due to rain and cold and still having his share of fun in a poodle of muddy water and uttered ”some unlucky dog…..”.
Latter saw my bike with distress and continued “….oh shit I am so screwed!!”
After some anxious moments saw hope in big red colors with two open doors. I decided to bail out from there in star BUS which had nothing shinny about it. The bus was fairly filled with commuters but my attention went towards a baby with his hands out of the window. Enjoying the drops of rain in his palms and trying to capture them. I wish even I could hold times that I spent with my beloved friends like when we unbuttoned our wet shirts and screamed our lungs out and a rainy night out spent in railway station once. While walking my way from bus stop to my college which is literally an ‘UP HILL’ task saw a bunch of kids enjoying the rain which had gotten little heavy by then. Ekdum bindas and free, like they have no worries of future and no regrets of past and said “I wish!!”.
Instead here I was trying to get my wet a** up the college wondering what the hell am I doing here like this. The raincoat barely kept me dry. The only thing good during that day was the view outside from the 3rd floor of my already rising college. Hazel grayish misty weather and a thin but consistent layer of rain mixed with breeze. It was a scene you can stare for infinity. No wonder I Got kicked out of the class for the same. I wanted to have something hot to drink but thinking about the same lame old espresso machine coffee was not so motivating either. Still I took it and maybe it was the magic that rain brings, the ambience made the coffee taste better. And I thought “waow !! What a sight. May GOD be BLESSED!”
While the self proclaimed mechanic was trying to prepare a diagnostics report of my bike I saw an old lady trying keeping her vegetables dry on her footpath side shop. Failing to do so, she started swearing some XYZ person in some language that was as good as Hebrew for me. Felt really bad for her.
By the time my bike decided to call off her strike it was late evening so I decide to go at a lake side coffee house to dry my doubly wet socks. Sitting there saw a group of couple enjoying the season with a stroll down the road. Then looked down and examined my hands shivering in gentle winds and wondered “ Dear mam…kash tum bhi yaha hoti !!” to say how I might catch cold due to this.
Starring at the raincoat I felt that may be it is a bit small for me but it would have kept you dry alright. My hanky is not enough to dry my wet hairs but your dupatta would have done the trick instantly. Also an spontaneous untimely laugh by remembering the way she pronounce certain words like “taste” instead of “test” and there would have been two cups of hot chocolate instead of one on this table. I smiled and continued to enjoy it with garlic bread.
The essences is that its said water has no color but rain itself has so many colors in it you just need to observe the things that you see and a moment with yourself would just do the trick rain teaches you to enjoy that very moment. I hate people who complain about rain. Because I don’t, as so many timeless moments are attached to it. No wonder people say they like rain because it brings back so many things in life. The sheer sight of rain in the horizon refreshes your sense and takes you on a time travel through your memories. There are so much worries in life least you can do is smile at the sight of others enjoying in present and remembering such moments of yours.
Hope you (all) get the message.
Awaiting your replies…..
Happy monsoon…

WE LIVE AND DIE; HE DIED AND LIVED

This one is a special dedication to a very special person. The one who lived and walked on this planet a approximately 2011 years ago. If you ask me the best example of unconditional love, sacrifice and forgiveness I would suggest his name. A lot has already been spoken and written on him surprisingly many years before he came into existence in flesh and blood. He was praised, adored, followed, loved, believed and can be said as one of the wisest man that has walked on this planet. Also he was persecuted, mocked, laughed, spitted, beaten, thrashed, amused and convicted. Still he stood for what he was sent to do on earth till his last breath. I know I am really nothing to comment on this great man life who has become an inspiration to more than millions and millions of souls.

Mostly people think that Christmas is the most important festival according to Christians    maybe because is symbolizes the birth of Jesus Christ but in reality Easter is the most important festival to a catholic all around the world. Because it reminds us what we are and what we believe in. This day was the same day when Lord Jesus Christ rose from the dead in flesh as he had said after crucifixion on GOOD FRIDAY. He was a living example of gods love to man.

The pinnacle of God love and affection to man was the knowing and willing sacrifice of Jesus and God knew that no matter how hard he wants to bar us from doing sins we will do it as we had done in past so he decided to send his own son in from of human and repent for mans sins. Imagine yourself taking punishment for mistakes done by every human being that has or will be born. I am damn sure you would never volunteer for this. That’s what he did and was chose and sent as human. One man taking punishment of sins of only god knows how many people. If you ask me what is the meaning of Christianity I would tell you it’s the celebration of Jesus Christ’s life. It is the celebration of life and death of one of the most selfless and pure hearted man, son of god as this is said in bible one of the old written manuscript. Remembering his love and sacrifice becoming a living example of it to make earth as good as heaven is Christianity.

Christianity is not a LIFESTYLE or REGULATION as most people believe and stereotyped as “if you are Christian than you MUST be alcoholic or compulsorily a NON-VEG or egotistical”. neither did Christ nor does the bible say any such things. Christianity doesn’t have a DO’s and DONT’s list.

If you believe in love, respect, equality, prayer, forgiveness, Gods Divine power and humanity at large then you are a Christian  If you have ever seen the statue of crucified Christ you see many injuries on Christ’s body its said that whenever any human being (catholic or non) sins its translated into an injury in is crucified body. It occurs whenever you don’t respect your parents, lie, commit adultery and the biggest scare occurs when you lose faith in your own self and in what you believe.

To feel what actually Jesus did see the movie THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST for a change and imagine what ever he did he did for you and whatever happened to him was because of your wrong doings and sins as it is traditionally known from ancient times. I know that am not perfect and it would be absolutely foolish to ask for one such thing as this world doesn't accept such people. But just make u realize how much more punishment you want him to have because of you and your deeds. Everyone has there own conscious and you know best more than anyone what right needs to be done. 

Christ said “don't just love you loved ones and hate those you don’t like but love those who hate you and pray for those who persecute you”

I pray the resurrected Christ forgive you of all your wrong doings and give a everlasting peace in life. Also you get the best EASTER eggs be delivered to you by Easter bunny this holy season.

Happy Easter and god bless you.

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A SIDDHI FOR AASIDDHI

The resent unpredicted rains caught me off guard and I was annoyed by the fact that I was stuck under a tree which barely provided any shelter for about an hour with some crazy people of which one was carrying her sandals in hand. It hadn’t stopped raining yet and I couldn’t move but those guys eventually did and as they left I saw the same girl walking bare foot on wet road holding sandals in her hands my initial reaction was “ajeeb pagal log hai yaar!”.

I turned around to check and there I saw someone had dropped a wallet there.

“Stupid people” I corrected myself.

I opened it to see a beautiful hand made sketch of Guruji, an ATM card and a family photo were clearly visible. This could be of one of them I realized.

I looked around they were walking and were some distant way

I shouted “excuse me!” none of the four responded

“Helloooo there Mr. Blue shirt” they just continued.

“Oh miss excuse me!!” the girl did not react.

“behere hai kya?”  I asked myself in an angry tone as I didn’t want to go out and wet myself

But eventually I had to run toward them shouting which made me more annoyed as they made me look foolish.

I pulled a guys shoulder and as he turned around I yelled “dude! You all deaf or what?”

Still the terrified confused guy was silent along with everyone. And all of a sudden the entire group simultaneously got busted with energy and started doing various kinds of hand action and I was shocked and embarrassed and without uttering any more words I just showed them the wallet. All of them checked and the bare footed girl got tensed.  She was the culprit. Then she snatched the wallet checked it as if I was a pickpocket and all of a sudden her expression change and I felt “dude I am so screwed”.

Again series of action were performed of which I understood none, then she did a Namskar and I interpreted it as a thank you all started smiling. I wanted to apologize for yelling but I guessed they didn’t hear as all had hearing disability.

“Nice sketch” I said and enacted. The girl smiled and nodded her head.

“Guruji? You drew it?” I questioned and she nodded with more energy with frisk hand motion close to her heart. All I could do was smile instead.

“what your name?” I questioned slowly and with wide mouth motion like a mimic.

And the name she had was one of the most amazing names that I ever heard

SIDDHI as it was written in driving license.

“SIDDHI!! Woaw!! Meaning unusual accomplishment or self perfection. Perhaps truly justifying her personality” I said to myself regretting my initial comments.

“Very meaningful name…..sanskrit?” I asked and she nodded and gave me one of the best smiles that I had ever seen in my life.

Things that happened subsequently where not important but how it began and how it ended were important. When everything was said and done the girl ‘SIDDHI’ was still walking bare foot on the road and was dumbstruck on my bike racing against time. In short we are so always running behind everything every time that we fail to notice the basic essence of life. Life goes as fast and as slow as we want it to like in above situation. Our reaction to an unexpected event like untimely rain is very dramatic where as a deaf girl just wants to enjoy her walk in rain that happened in middle of summer season and I can hardly remember the last time I walked bare footed on road during rain enjoying it. Its like traveling in a train, you can see the glimpse of many new cities but to actually enjoy it you have to get down from the speeding train itself. similarly by the time we have achieve what we want we are so busy in setting new goals for ourselves that we forget to enjoy our own SIDDHI, our achievements. Some one said to me that what ever you have achieved till date is your SIDDHI and its different from other around you. Life throws this opportunity to everyone the trick is to recognize it and experience it. That’s what a imperfect girl named SIDDHI taught me that day.

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what i earned with what i lost....

             Hey I am back again I know there is a little wind about my writing but for all those who read my articles painstakingly I extend my sincerest gratitude. There is a certain way in which life teaches us its rules, sometimes this is very easy and most of the time in very difficult way. Its boils down to how one pictures himself in it. I still don't believe that what ever happens happens for good but its how you stand up and continue when bad things had happened to you. Exactly 1 year and 1 day ago was the worst day of my life and since then things have actually transpired. That too in a very considerable level and it’s evident. Now that when I sat on bench in grotto starring at Mother Mary my attention went to the fallen dried golden leaves all around me telling how unexpected things actually creates new things.

I know expecting too much from life is very common but the shock comes when unexpected things happen in your life. It’s really amazing how life that it always proves you wrong or at least uneducated about things that you know about it. Just like the leaves as they looks very amazing and it improves the beauty of nature when its green and on trees but even when they fall they create one of the most beautiful scenery. There was a time when I was very much skeptic about thing like LOVE, EMOTION, SEVA and SATVA.

But this phase actually helped me understanding these aspects of Ignatius Lewis too. It made me realize there is actually something some unique feeling and need of LOVE in life. It knocks at everyone’s door the tricky part is to know when are you ready to open the door. Also it shouldn’t be defined or bracketed. Now I know what was actually missing in my personality after seeing two people actually in love that’s true and divine and the sense of belonging to someone is very precious. Though I didn’t chose to fall for it but such emotions keep racking up your mind. Although we think that we are emotionally strong (I too) but again I was proved wrong. My meditation teacher tells me to stay happy come what may but doing it is like being ignorant and playing fool your mind. Though what I believe is that in order to raise outside you have to fall inside and experiencing all emotions actually makes you strong and supple at the same time.

The best way to fall inside and rise outside is Dhyan and Meditation. 

Similarly she says the best way to become happy is by making others happy and by being source of some ones happiness. A very beautiful word SEVA or service without favors helps you in this big time. It actually helps and when it’s done with honesty and selflessly.

One of the most amazing new word that I came is SATVA. I just can’t find the right words to thank the peoples who helped me realize it and persuaded me to experience it. Satva basically means purity of life and your existence itself.

It’s the accumulation of goodness and purity of mind and soul. Each person gets the chance to earn there satva, the reason of happiness and fulfillment in life as understood by me. SATVA is basically the combination of all the above things and knowing that you have actually gain some satva helps you in you self-confidence as unless you don’t know yourself there no chance that others can know you, and the best way to know yourself is by being with yourself and enjoying it too. How you do it is your path to choose, what I chose is mentioned above.

 I know last year hasn’t been as good as I expected it to be but unexpected has always been the flavor of life. End of the day everyone goes to sleep at night but how you undertake your journey from good morning to good night actually matters.

I hope this year brings me luck and help me get back what I have lost and grow stronger with blessings of almighty, parents and you my dearest friends.

Happy birthday to me…

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Love as (and how) it Happens

To be very honest I never really understood the term LOVE. Partly because it never happened to me and the more for the damage that people has caused to the reputation of this word. For me love is respect. Also when people start to expect there love to be just like shown in films, movies and television serials it gets complicated and boring. You know there is serious issues in you life when you partner asks you “how would you define our relation?”

Peoples constantly pursue a need to define things in life. I mean LOVE is defiantly not a thing to be defined or categorize as usually done by people it’s a feeling. I feel this is one of the simplest and also most controversial topic to write. I personally don't like to categorize LOVE it would like categorizing food joints around city or your cousins as a matter of fact on basis of whom you love more and less. It really amuses when people utter words like UNDERSTANDING, BONDING, CONNECTION, CHEMISTRY, COMMITMENT and RELATIONSHIP. I mean love is love and there is no other synonym to it. It truly what you feel for a person, who ever they may be and it’s the most purist of emotion. Inclusion of these words had adulterated the true meaning of love and made a complicated thing out of a feeling that's absolutely spontaneous and unbiased.

 It has become so complex that our University can start a new branch of engineering to understand it. I mean there are actually levels or stages in which you love someone.

Like crush, understanding, love, commitment and relationship…..and god know what more in between. How the hell these terms came into scene? Here is my definition of the above terms

CRUSH- “its mine” type of feeling for a certain jeans during window shopping. You think you have a chance until you are proved wrong.

UNDERSTANDING- it’s like a probation period of a company. The more you think you know the little you actually know and understand it.

THE PROPOSAL- its like a mouse trap. Either you have the mouse or the cheese is lost.

LOVE- its like a heavily marketed flop movie. You expect a lot from what actually there is to be offered.

COMMITMENT- its like a life time guarantee on electronic appliances. Everybody wants it but none is ready to give it.

RELATIONSHIP- its like a public toilet. People outside are desperate to get in and people in are dying to get out.

To be honest love should never be categorized and labeled as such. It should not be for someone special but everyone should special from your love. it should always be like taste of chocolate. Always same but still special for everyone that would be real love if there will be any. Just like the LOVE and AFFECTION that a baby has pure, unadulterated and absolutely unbiased from its very existence. Also it should not be left to be expressed on a particular special day or occasion like Valentines Day. Whenever you get a chance to show your affection just do it without thinking much back and forth. Be it your girlfriend, your crush, your wife or your family or friends. Not by some fancy costly gift but by a sms from heart or a big smile can do wonders. As long as its pure its divine, as long as its divine its true, as long as its true its LOVE. By anyone, for anyone.

Happy vals day.

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IF LOOKS COULD KILL!!!!

If looks could kill I would have been definatly dead that day. I am saying this because I had been a victim of such a crime once before and injury this time around was a bit deep. I never knew when and what hit me but surely something did as I was caught off guard. I won’t lie also because the incident happened at a temple and all I felt was honest. Surprisingly the more you think you know a person the more they prove you wrong. There is something mysterious about her.
The three of us were having a general conversation and there was a instant when I accidentally looked at her only to find out that her eyes starring at god and that was a continuous stare as if praying desperately for or about something which I thought she was actually doing with lots of hope and belief and needing something that actually she deserve. Those eyes were so fixed at idol she had absolutely no idea about the conversation which was going on. I could even see reflection of street lights from all over those eyes.
Just like the reflection of lights that is seen on water in a clear dark night, sparkling and hazy. There was hint of accumulation of tears in eyes just before the floodgates open and things go loose. I guess faith in god and trust in destiny were the only things holding the dam during that overflow of emotions from what I believe you can’t enact or hide them. It was really bad to see brightness and shine of hopes, dreams and aspirations covered by clouds of fear and uncertainty. Seeing that look in those eyes scared the living daylights out of me. I don’t know how to phrase it correctly as words can be interpreted in many different meanings.
You might sum up the entire event to be a purely imaginative and exaggerated and I won’t be if you do so. In other words when you visit art gallery you barely pay attention towards the color of wall behind or the type of frame of the painting. Your full attention is captured by the painting and not things around it. So after looking at a particular painting for 3-4 times you can easily tell weather anything has changed in it from the last time you saw it. It’s like you see something new every time you see that painting. Also no matter how bad or attractive the wall or frame is the beauty lies in the painting itself. Hers painting in my mind starts from supratrochlear to infratrochlear filled with colors of integrity and respect all the way. Anything apart from it doesn’t matters to me.
From what I have learned some people deserve so much better form life knowing that there approach towards it was good, positive and greeting. Contrastingly the things that you want very dreadfully are sometime most illusive. Seeing them go through same phase through which you already had been and you are unable to empathize on the situation. Such things make you feel so timid and vulnerable about things in life. This made me realize that there is more in life than just achieving success and statues. End of the day such things may even works as fuel to drive you to your goal and happiness. You know there is a saying “YOUR EYES SEE WHAT YOU WANT IT TO SEE” but still without happiness and a method to convey it to people around you, it life is like a lame old donkey. Hope the gloomy painting would be filled with bright and beautiful colors of success, happiness and joy as they were before.

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